Oh I wonder

Recently two of my cousins have gotten married. It's been 2 years since we've had a wedding in our family (on my mom's side of the family), 4 years since a wedding in my immediate family. Every time someone gets married I start getting paranoid. I just know that they are going to get pregnent right away and start popping out little ones.

* When my younger sister got married every time she was sick or tired; in my mind I wondered if she was pregnent. Was there something she wasn't telling me? As time went by and I realized that she had no intention of getting pregnent I started to worry less.

But now it's back. With my cousins newly married status I am back to wondering. Everytime his wife mentions that she's been sick or she's really tired I wonder.

It's not that I wouldn't be happy for them. I just want them to enjoy being married for a while before they get pregnent. I want neices and nephews, I think it would be fun to have kids at our family parties again. But not this soon. I'm sure they are all on birth control, it's not my place to ask though. It's not my decision when they should start a family. And I can't be selfish and want them not to have children just because we can't. Personally I wouldn't wish what we are going through on anyone. It's horrible to know that there is only a 60% chance of every having a baby through medical means.

So the reason for this post: nothing really just getting my thoughts out there. I hope that one day my cousins will have children... just not right now.